We all want to find love... right??
If you're look for love has been anything like mine, you'll know how hard it can be to try find your 'the one'.
As I'm advised not to date colleagues or classmates, and I am not attracted to drunken people who dad dance and cannot have a conversation with me without slurring their words, love has never really been on the cards.
Don't get me wrong, I've had relationships, just nothing major and the guys have usually been friends of friends. So when my friend suggested online dating I kind of had the "why not?" attitude. What's the worst that could happen?? Bump into somebody you know and rumour goes round that you're desperate to find love??
I don't believe online dating is as frowned upon as it was 5-10 years ago. Every other television advert seems to be for an online dating site. Although signing up still makes me personally feel a little cringey!
As I'm a student with little money and wasn't 100% convinced by this form of finding the one, I wanted to sign up to something completely free that wasn't going to charge me to do basic things that internet dating sites need to work (i.e. reading & sending messages).
I firstly signed up to POF as I knew of people that have used it and said that its an okay place to start. However when talking to people on this site, I found that the vast majority of users stuck to this one site - therefore I was missing out on many potentials that stick to other dating sites.
To broaden my search and to also get enough information to blog about online dating, I have also signed up to 2 other free online dating websites.
Notes on online dating safety:
- 18+ is not a guideline, its a rule.
- Never use your real name as a user name - Its amazing how much information people can find on you using the internet knowing just your name.
- Never give out your personal details unless you have known the person for an adequate amount of time - also look into Facebook (or other networking sites) if possible to ensure this is a real/genuine person you are talking to.
- Use Kik Messenger or other messaging apps rather than giving out your mobile number - knowing your mobile number can again open up opportunities for people to do their research on you.
- If meeting, always meet in a public place. This way you will be a lot safer.
Plenty Of Fish (POF):
Plenty of fish is possibly the most well known free dating site in the UK hence it being my first online dating experience. It is available as an app as well as a website so you can browse whilst on the go!
The site was extremely easy to sign up to. It required just a user name, email, password, then a few questions about yourself such as location (not address) ethnicity & age to create an account.
Once the account was created you could fill in more information about yourself and what you were looking for or could save that for later whilst you looked around the site.
There is a section that makes up your profile which gives you a drop down box in which you can choose one option that describes you - Hair colour, eye colour, height, build etc.
The second section to fill in on your profile is written, kind of like an essay about yourself. POF recommends that you:
1. Talk about your hobbies.
2. Talk about your goals and aspirations
3. Talk about yourself and what makes you unique.
4. Describe your taste in music.
2. Talk about your goals and aspirations
3. Talk about yourself and what makes you unique.
4. Describe your taste in music.
You could also write a bit more about what you're looking for in a partner.
The third section of your profile is also a written one where you are to describe your ideal first date. Easy enough.
One thing I would suggest to do first on this site before writing out your profile is to upload a few photos of yourself as your profile goes live automatically and you do not want to miss out on people seeing you. You get the option to upload 0-8 images completely free, any more and you'd have to pay a fee to upgrade.
I personally haven't seen many upgraded users on this site as there's not much more it offers to users that are of much use except the option to upload up to 16 photos, being more likely to be viewed and seeing whether your messages have been read. Upgrading costs between £35-£81 depending on how long you would like to be a member for.
There are a few features to this site in which you can find different matches. However I have only found the following features useful:
Meet Me is a feature in which you see a photograph of somebody within your age and distance range and you simply click yes, no or maybe. If both you and that person have clicked either yes or maybe, you will both be notified of a potential match.
There is also a feature called Search. This feature allows you to enter all the things you are looking for (e.g. age, location, intent, body type, education level etc.) and this will bring up all the profiles that match for you to have a look at.
Local is a feature that is used on the POF app. It will show you online users and how close they are to you.
On all of these features and the ones that I haven't mentioned, there is an option to message the person you are viewing. These messages are then sent to the persons inbox where they can read, view your profile and images and choose whether to reply or not.
My experience of this site hasn't been anything that amazed me. Within a couple of days of signing up I had received over 150 messages - I'm not sure if this is the case for everyone and if you live in a low populated area this might effect the amount of messages you receive.
I'm not going to lie to people, there are many fake accounts and a lot of people that aren't very pleasant towards others - this goes for both men and women!! However there are block and report options, which are reviewed regularly by POF and hopefully you will see these accounts removed.
However its not all doom, gloom and harassment. I have met up with 4 guys from POF within 2 months of being signed up. Unfortunately nothing came of any of these, but I am still receiving a steady flow of messages a day (3/4).
Final Scores:
Ease of signing up: 5/5
Image allowance: 5/5
Ease of use: 5/5
Features: 4/5
Oasis:
The second dating site that I signed up to (mainly for research purposes, partly to look for new potentials) is Oasis. At the moment this dating site is only available as a website and is not as yet an app however I have no doubt that it will be in the future.
Again this site made it extremely easy to create an account requiring only a username, password and email address.
You are then required to set up your profile like any other dating website.
The first section is to identify your location. By entering your postcode, the site finds your city. Easy!
The second section is the dreaded About Me. I have simply copied and pasted the things about me that I have written on my POF account. Oasis suggests that you write about:
- Your personality
- Your hobbies
- Your interests
Section three is your What You're Looking For section, again written. I would suggest you write out exactly what you want. You have more chance of avoiding the creepers if you set the boundaries and put them in their place.
The next section is a group of drop down boxes in which you can select the answer which relates to you. Questions in this section are mainly about your appearance and life style.
Section five is another easy section. This section has tick boxes with options for your different interests. It also has empty boxes in case you're into something a bit different.
The last section is your Seeking Criteria. It is here that you can select whether you're looking for a relationship or friends and also the age of the person/people you are looking for and the distance that they live from you.
Once all of these sections are complete, the site takes you to your profile. It is here that you can change the theme/background on your profile. You can also update your gallery in which you can upload up to 20 images!!
You also need to upload a main profile image which will be the first thing people see when searching for matches.
As soon as my profile was all set up, I was slightly confused as to how the site worked.
On the Home page there is an activity box which tells you what's happening with your profile constantly, whether it be an image you've uploaded being approved or whether somebody is looking at your profile. A down side to this is the notification sound!!
There is a requests tab on the top of all pages which tells you if somebody has requested to make contact with you. If this is the case, you can view their profile and choose whether or not you would like contact with this person - yes there is an option to say no and they are notified that you have said no, however you can add a reason!!
If you choose to contact somebody on this site and they approve or vice versa, your conversation starts in a new section of the page on the right which is very much like a messenger feature.
Another feature of this site is the Matches feature. This simply shows you which people match your Seeking Criteria that you entered when you were setting up your account. You can browse through these peoples profiles and send them a request to start a conversation if you like what you see and read.
There is also the search feature. This feature allows you to enter the criteria that you're looking for and look through the people who match this criteria. Again you can then look through the profiles and decide whether you would like contact with these people.
When browsing peoples profiles, you can like their photos in the same way you would like photos on Facebook. You can also send people 'Flirts' if you are an upgraded member, rather than requesting contact to show that you're interested.
As with all dating websites, there are fake accounts, rude people and people who want nothing but to harass people who have told them they're not interested.
So far I have not had a lot of luck on this site. There doesn't seem to be a huge amount of people on it who are in my area.
Overall I'm not very impressed with this dating site at all. Its confusing to get the hang of, it doesn't appear to have a lot of members and it is covered in advertisements popping up all over the place. I have only been using this site a matter of days and am already considering deleting my account (partly because I mainly signed up for the research aspect of it, partly because it seems to be pretty useless!!)
Final Scores:
Ease of signing up: 5/5
Image allowance: 5/5
Ease of use: 2/5
Features: 2/5
Uniform Dating:
Uniform dating is another site I have signed up to (partly to broaden my search and partly for research) I am not one for fancying people in uniform really, and have signed up to this because it is another free well known dating website.
This dating site is available in webpage form and as an app for phones and tablets.
I first heard of this site when I saw the sites television advertisement. My first thoughts when seeing this advert was that it tries to imply that its for people who wear uniform or fancy people who wear uniform...which in my eyes is the vast majority of the population. I mean even people who work at McDonalds have a uniform!!
Signing up again was very simple. You are first asked for what you are looking for i.e. (Man seeking woman, woman seeking man), the age range of what you are looking for, and the first part of your postcode. You are then directed to the second page of signing up where you need to enter your name (I have opted to use a fake name for my own safety), and email address and a password. This then sends you an email the email address you have entered to make sure it is legitimate - so don't enter a fake email!!
The next step is to enter a little more about yourself, your date of birth, whether you work in a uniform and the town that you live in. You are then asked to describe your appearance, sexuality and your profession... then the dreaded essay 'about yourself' section - You are only allowed a maximum of 300 characters which I don't think is enough to sell yourself.
Once you get onto the main part of the site, you can edit your profile with given sections such as an option to enter information on your appearance in a lot more detail, what you like doing in your spare time, and your favourite things.
One of the first things I would advise doing before concentrating on the written sections, is to upload a profile image - You go straight into the searches as soon as you sign up and people will not look at your profile without an image first. Your profile image needs to be approved by Uniform dating so to speed the process up, do this FIRST!! The photo you choose however needs to be cropped down using the website to a square shape - This has caused me a bit of trouble because most photos are rectangular so you have no choice but to cut off part of your face or your legs etc.
You can then add photos to your gallery. Again these photos need to be cropped down to a square shape!!
Once you're happy with your profile and images, you can get exploring.
Down the left hand side of the webpage, there is a notifications box which shows you if you have new messages, flirts, admirers or likes. You can open these options up to read or view who has sent them to you.
Further down this side of the page is your options of how you would like to search. You can either enter do a quick or advanced search by entering the information you're looking for, or have uniform dating create some matches for you based on the information you and the other person have entered and have in common.
There are a few features to this site. The first is the option to send a message to the person you are interested in. The second is to send a flirt or like to the person if you're not feeling confident enough to make the first move. Apart from these, there isn't a lot more to do without being a member which allows you to join in on a live chat.
Another thing I am slightly disappointed in with this site is that you have to be an upgraded member to read some peoples messages.
Again there are the occasional fake profile on this site and you will more than likely get at least one unpleasant message however there do appear to be a decent amount of real and friendly people on there.
One of the big down sides to this site is that it displays pretty much exactly where you are living to the people who are viewing your profile - this isn't the best of ideas in my opinion!! You never know who is watching you!! This could make you extremely easy to hunt down, especially if you live in a teeny village like myself!! - Safe to say I will be removing my profile very soon after I have done my research!!
Final Scores:
Ease of signing up: 5/5
Image allowance: 3/5 - because of the cropping issue.
Ease of use: 4/5
Features: 1/5
Comparison:
All 3 sites were extremely easy to sign up to. None of them took longer than a couple of minutes to set up an account. However I felt that POF was the easiest and Uniform Dating was the most tedious.
In terms of image allowance and quality Oasis wins the race hands down!! With an allowance of 20 images with no need of cropping this is definitely the best at the visual selling of yourself. Again Uniform Dating was my least favourite for images as it was a nightmare finding decent photos of myself which I could crop down into a square without cropping off important parts of the image.
The winner for ease of use has to go to POF. It is very straight forward as everything has been kept as simple as possible. The site I found most difficult was Oasis as everything seemed to be all over the place - however the more I used it, the easier it became.
POF wins on the features by a clear mile. They had made it fairly fun to view and find different people in a number of ways. Oasis and Uniform Dating didn't have a great choice of ways to view and find people except for entering a search criteria and scrolling through pages and pages filled with people who related slightly to what you wanted.
Safety is always a huge worry for the majority of people using dating sites (particularly for women!). I found that Both Oasis and POF were safe enough to use and didn't give out too much information. Uniform dating however disappointed me in the fact that it displayed the village you lived in rather then the county or town!! - as I've said before, it is extremely easy for the wrong kind of people to hunt you down using the internet knowing just a few details about you. All 3 sights seem to be hot on removing fake and abusive accounts making it a safer place to communicate with people.
POF and Uniform Dating get a few more brownie points as they have an app from phones and tablets - therefore there should be more users online at all times.
Users is probably the most important thing with a dating website. If there's nobody to find, nobody will look right?? POF and Uniform dating seemed to have a lot more users than Oasis. However this may be down to them being more well known. I'm sure over the next few months to a year, more and more people will hear about Oasis and join up - especially if they're having no luck with other sites.
My Winner:
If I had to pick just one site to join, I would most definitely pick POF out of these 3 sites. I couldn't find much to complain about with this site, felt safe from weirdo stalkers were going to find out where I lived and turned up at my door and also the site provides fun features to keep and help you looking!!
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